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Beach bodies, as rated by marine biologists

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Whale3

Sea nettle (2/5)
Ouch! Their transparent look makes them hard to spot, but a surprise encounter with one of these beach bodies can really hurt your seaside enjoyment.

Penguin (3/5)
The coolest penguins are chilling on beaches in Australia, South Africa and Argentina this season. They certainly dress to impress, but does your beach body really need a dinner jacket?

Sperm Whale (0/5)
Oh no, the whale is not beach body ready at all! We told it repeatedly to stay off the beach, but here it is, a blubbering mess. Get back in the sea!

Turtle2Leatherback turtle (5/5)
These babies were BORN with beach bodies, and immediately ready for a late night dip in the ocean.

Sea star (4/5)
With its striking five-fold symmetry, the sea star is a gorgeous sight on the hot sandy beach this summer. It’s sure to take your breath away – and its own, as it realizes it relies on water flow over its dermal gills for oxygen uptake.

Hermit crab (4/5)
Wow! You’ve got to love the asymmetrical curves on this beach body. Combining it with a second-hand bathing suit is a daring choice.

Human (5/5)
This land mammal’s mostly hairless body is perfectly adaptable to the beach ecosystem. Just remember: wear sunscreen!

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